Month: January 2023

Older women sitting outside with her computer while she writes notes with a pen

What is a Transfer-on-Death Designation?

Written by Matthew Reinaker on January 31, 2023. Posted in Estate Planning, Last Will & Testament.

Avoid the costly and time-consuming probate process by using the Transfer-on-Death Designation

Most people want to avoid probate court, and for good reason! Anyone responsible for being an Executor during the probate process knows how time-consuming, grueling, and expensive it can be. The good news is probate can be avoided with proper planning and using available estate planning tools like a Transfer-on-Death (TOD) or Payable-on-Death (POD) designation. If you want your loved ones to avoid probate, and your estate is simple and straightforward, then a TOD or POD might be a more viable solution.

What is a Transfer-on-Death Designation?

A transfer-on-death designation allows a principal to transfer the ownership of the property to a named beneficiary without going through the probate process. This designation is legally recognized in Virginia when a Virginia Transfer on Death Deed is filed. For a transfer-on-death designation to be valid, it must be filed before the principal’s death. A TOD is a helpful estate planning tool when the principal’s primary assets are real estate or bank accounts, and the principal only has a few other assets or debts. There are a few specific TOD designations:

Transfer-on-Death Deeds for Real Estate
Transfer-on-Death Registration for Vehicles
Payable-on-Death Designations for Bank Accounts
Transfer-on-Death Registration for Securities

In Virginia, a transfer-on-death (TOD) designation allows for the transfer of ownership of certain assets, such as bank accounts, brokerage accounts, and real estate, to a designated beneficiary outside of probate court. However, the current owner retains the right to manage the assets as they see fit during their lifetime. This includes the ability to mortgage, sell, or revoke the beneficiary designation without notifying or obtaining approval from the beneficiary. While the beneficiary may be aware of the TOD designation, they do not have any legal rights to the property until the death of the current owner. They cannot make any changes to the property or sell it on their own. The principal does not have to notify the beneficiary that they were named as the beneficiary. The principal can keep the TOD private until they revoke it or pass away.

It’s important to note that if there are any outstanding loans on the property, a TOD designation does not affect the creditors’ rights concerning those loans. Additionally, a TOD designation does not give the beneficiary’s creditors any rights to the property while the current owner is still alive.

Older women sitting outside with her computer while she writes her transfer-on-death designation with a pen.

Pros: Using a Transfer-on-Death Designation

One of the benefits of using a TOD is that it is not limited to property like land or real estate. It can also apply to personal property like jewelry, cars, and recreational vehicles. If the principal has a straightforward estate, they can avoid probate by using a TOD instead of a last will and testament. Another benefit of a Transfer on Death Deed is that putting a beneficiaries name on our deed ahead of time will mean they will own the property immediately after your death.

The primary benefit of having a valid Virginia TOD deed is that the beneficiary can avoid the hassle and legal expense of probate after death. The cost associated with getting a TOD in place is much more affordable than the costs associated with setting up a revocable living trust.

However, since the current owner retains the right to revoke the TOD designation at any time, it is considered an “incomplete gift” under federal gift tax laws. This means the owner is not required to pay gift taxes on the property transfer.

Cons: Using a Transfer-on-Death Designation

One drawback to a Transfer on Death designation is that it does not allow for continued beneficiaries like a trust would. The property will be given to the beneficiaries immediately upon the passing of the principal, and they can do with it what they want. If the property is in a trust, there are rules and stipulations around how the property is used, if it can be sold, or if it should continue to be passed down.

A TOD designation does not give the beneficiary’s creditors any rights to the property while the current owner is still alive. However, once the property is transferred to the beneficiary, it can be subject to property tax and liens, and the beneficiaries creditors can come after the property if they are owed money. It does not have the protection that a revocable living trust can provide.

How Does a Transfer-on-Death Help the Probate Process?

For many people, a Transfer-on-Death Designation is an affordable estate planning tool. A transfer-on-death designation can streamline the probate process by allowing assets to pass directly to the listed beneficiary without needing to go through probate. In addition, there is no requirement to notify your beneficiary that there is a TOD in place and ownership of the property will be transferred to them upon death, and in many cases, it is simple as providing proof of identification and a valid death certificate to complete the transfer.

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Serving clients throughout Virginia, our experienced and trustworthy professionals simplify the process using clear, understandable language free of legal jargon and provide flat-rate packages, so you’re never surprised by the bill. Contact us today and rest assured that your affairs are in order and your loved ones are protected.

Estate Planning Tips for Avoiding Probate

Written by Matthew Reinaker on January 30, 2023. Posted in Estate Planning.

The probate process can be expensive and time-consuming. Learn 4 ways you can structure your assets to keep your estate (and loved ones) out of probate court.

What Is Probate?

Probate is the court process of transferring your assets after your death to your beneficiaries. Under the supervision of a judge, the probate court will validate your last will and testament, approve your executor, and ensure your assets are distributed properly and that any applicable taxes are paid.

Many people think that a last will and testament will protect them from the probate process but that is not true—all wills go through probate court. And while there are many reasons one might want to avoid this process, there are also ways to avoid this lengthy and costly process. Here are 4 reasons to avoid probate and proven tips from an estate planning attorney to help you circumvent this process (that can sometimes take years to resolve).

Family meets to discuss estate planning for parents.

4 Reasons To Avoid Probate

Assets will be frozen. Frozen assets might throw a wrench into delicate or time-sensitive situations where access to funds is necessary for important financial decisions. One example is planning and paying for your funeral. If you did not set funds aside and there is no transfer on death (TOD) designation or joint ownership on a bank account your loved ones will not be able to access funds to pay for costs associated with your funeral.

The probate process can be slow. The probate process can take anywhere from six months to more than two years. Certain benchmarks have to be met before the next step is started: The executor must be approved, debts must be settled, taxes paid, beneficiaries named, and assets distributed. If there are any objections this can stall the process and your estate will incur additional attorney fees.

The process can be expensive. It is not uncommon for attorney costs, executor fees, filing fees, and administrative fees to cost nearly 10% of the gross estate. This can add up quickly if the probate process is drawn out or challenged. If you want to avoid giving a major chunk of change to the government after your death, avoiding a lengthy probate process is your best bet.

Probate proceedings become public records. If you are a private person you might want to keep that privacy after your death. Probate court becomes a public record and all of the details surrounding your assets and debts will be shared.

4 Ways to Prevent Your Estate From Probate

Establish a Revocable Living Trust: Assets in a trust do not get frozen, but the same can not be said for a will. A last will and testament is a great document to lay out your wishes but it does very little to protect your loved ones from the arduous probate process. To avoid this costly avenue, consider setting up a revocable living trust where your assets are held in a trust account where you can function as the trustee until your death. A revocable trust will shift to an irrevocable trust after your death and your estate will be taxed and then distributed to your heirs. In most states, the process and documents of transferring the trust are private and none of the information is publicly filed. Unlike probate court, you, your estate, and your heirs will be able to maintain a level of privacy. The only way to protect your estate from the cost of probating a will is to create a living trust.

Designate Beneficiaries: Designating a Beneficiary on your bank accounts, retirement accounts, annuities, and life insurance policies is an easy task with minimal paperwork. Many companies require the paperwork as part of setting up your account. This designation is unique to each asset so if someone chooses this route they will have to file paperwork with each entity holding the asset. After your death, the beneficiary will receive the assets as an inheritance. One important note is that the beneficiary designation will override anything laid out in a last will and testament.

Hold Property Jointly: If you are married there is a good chance any property acquired during your marriage is already jointly held with your spouse. Upon your death, your spouse will become the sole owner of the property. It is still a good idea to have larger assets like property, land, fine art, and family heirlooms in a trust and not rely solely on jointly-held property. If something happens to both parties at the same time, like a car accident, then the jointly held property is still in a trust and will avoid probate as it passes to your heirs.

Gifting Your Estate Before Death: One option to avoid probate court is to give portions of your estate before your death. One of the pros of going this route is that you get to experience the joy and excitement of giving your family gifts and being able to see them receive the gift. Without a trust, your estate could end up in probate court, and everything from money and family heirlooms to property could be put through the probate process which is both expensive and time-consuming.

Mobile Estate Planning Made Easy

Serving the Greater Richmond area and beyond, our experienced and trustworthy professionals simplify the process using clear, understandable language free of legal jargon and provide flat-rate packages, so you’re never surprised by the bill. Contact us today and rest assured that your affairs are in order and your loved ones are protected.

How to Appoint an Executor For Your Will

Written by Matthew Reinaker on January 30, 2023. Posted in Estate Planning, Last Will & Testament.

The executor of your estate is responsible for distributing your assets, paying your debtors, and ensuring your beneficiaries receive their inheritance.

Have you ever heard the Winston Churchill quote, “He who fails to plan, plans to fail?” Failing to plan for the right person or entity to be an executor of your will after your death can lead to a long, arduous, and costly process. To best serve your estate and your beneficiaries you should appoint an executor for your will.

Young woman speaking to her grandmother about appointing an executor for her estate.

The one thing you don’t want your loved one to inherit is a headache! Appointing an executor is a detail that should not be overlooked in the process of planning a will. If you decide to not appoint an executor, the courts will appoint one on your behalf—this can be expensive and stall the process of estate settlement.

The executor’s role carries a lot of responsibility in protecting, managing, and distributing the estate assets to the named beneficiaries. In other words, you want to designate an executor you trust who is capable of intently carrying out your wishes. Thus, selecting an executor for your estate can be a difficult decision. Take time to consider a handful of candidates before deciding on one that can carry out all of the duties necessary to protect your estate.

What is an Executor?

An executor of a will is an individual selected by you, also known as the testator, to carry out the wishes laid out in your will. They will manage the estate settlement until the assets are distributed and the estate is closed. In some cases, the executor may be a corporate entity or bank, especially if there is a trust in place. But for many, the executor is someone close to the testator like a spouse, child, or close family member. You want the process of settling your estate to be as quick, cost-effective, and painless as possible.

What Responsibilities Does an Executor Have?

Executors can be subject to probate court oversight and carry many responsibilities that range from maintaining the assets while working through the estate settlement process to notifying government agencies of the testator’s passing. Here is a short list of some responsibilities that you can expect will fall under the executor’s duties:

File the will with the appropriate probate court and be available during the probate process
Notify all beneficiaries or interested parties listed in the will
Identify all of the testator’s assets
Maintain property and assets until distributed
Pay off all debtors
Pay all state and federal taxes
Distribute or transfer all remaining funds, assets, or property to the beneficiaries named in the will
Close or cancel any accounts like social security, credit cards, or subscriptions
Close the estate

How to Choose the Right Executor

Often, selecting the right person can be one of the toughest tasks in the estate planning process. This selection can be emotional and carries a lot of weight. You want to select an executor for your will who is available immediately and can manage the responsibility of starting the probate process even while dealing with their grief. The executor of an estate should be responsible, trusted, and not have any outstanding feuds with any of your beneficiaries.

The executor should be firm and direct about protecting all assets until the process is finished. Select an executor for your will who will not go against the interests of the beneficiaries or act against the provisions of the will. This process can be complex and time-consuming. Appointing someone responsible and diligent who understands that they can face legal and civil ramifications if they do not fulfill all of their duties is critical.

Appointing the Executor You Selected

If you decided on an executor to include in your will, congratulations! This is one of the hardest decisions in this process. Naming an executor is as simple as putting their name as the chosen executor in your will and giving the necessary information to the executor regarding where to find your will after you pass away. It is not required to share all of the details laid out in the will with the executor—this can stay confidential. In the event that you pass away, the named executor will file a petition with the probate court to be confirmed as the executor and start the process of closing the estate and distributing the assets—just as you laid out in your last will and testament.

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What is a Holographic Will?

Written by Matthew Reinaker on January 30, 2023. Posted in Estate Planning, Last Will & Testament.

Should you DIY your own will and does it hold up in court? Here are answers to frequently asked questions and the pros and cons of holographic wills.

Maybe you’re planning an international vacation and you want to make sure that in the event something happens to you or your spouse, your children will be well cared for by the person of your choice. Maybe you were born into the Bezos family and want to secure your multibillion-dollar inheritance. Maybe you won the lottery and want to make sure that when you pass, a hefty sum of money goes to every animal shelter in the Northern Hemisphere. Whatever your final wishes may be, if you’ve ever wondered how to write your own last will and testament, look no further. Here’s how it works.

Writing Your Own Will: A How-To

Step 1: Take out a piece of paper and a pen or pencil. Yes, actual pen and paper.

Step 2: Write your will. It should look something like this: “I, [your name], leave my entire estate to my wife, Jane Smith.” Or, “I, Elizabeth Client, leave my estate equally to my children, Anna, Barry, and Chris.” Personalize this with your name and the names of your beneficiaries.

Step 3: Sign your will.

Voila! You (probably) have a valid will. For bonus points, write “Will” at the top so your family knows what they’re looking at. Not necessary, but a nice touch. If that feels too easy, you might have some questions right now. Let’s answer a few of them.

Couple sits down together to write their last will and testament.

What is a holographic will?

Writing out your own will and signing it yourself is called a holographic will and is typically considered valid in the state of Virginia. While this method is almost effortless and doesn’t cost you anything, it may not be the best or safest option. Aside from the important fact that the will was written by a layperson and not a lawyer or your holographic will contains unclear language or spurs uncertainty, this cheap and easy method could cost your loved ones more than just money after you’re gone.

Does a holographic will hold up in court?

A holographic will, or a will written by the testator, is typically considered valid in the state of Virginia, even without witnesses or a notary.

What if important details are missed in a holographic will?

You might also be wondering, “What about my minor children? Who’s going to watch them?” Or, “What about charitable gifts I want to make?” or “What about an Executor? Don’t I need one of those?” Or even more generally, “…isn’t there supposed to be more stuff in here?”

These are all great questions and all of this should 100% be included in a good will. The key word there is good will. This post is about writing a will. Every client is unique and every situation is a little different. So although a one-sentence will might be a valid legal document in Virginia, it’s probably not an adequate expression of your final wishes, nor can you guarantee they will be carried out.

Writing a Holographic Will: The Bottom Line

Sure you can go online and print out your own will pretty cheaply, just like you can scrawl out your last wishes in crayon on a dirty napkin if you like. To recap, the pros of a holographic will are:

A holographic will is free
A holographic will is easy
A holographic will can be made anywhere, including your local Waffle House
A holographic will has legal standing in Virginia
You can use your favorite color crayon in your holographic will

But the old adage “You get what you pay for” does ring true in this scenario when you consider the risks of a holographic will:

Holographic wills often omit important information that adversely affects your loved ones after you die
Holographic wills are not written by an experienced lawyer, leaving room for uncertainty, ambiguity, and potential inaccuracies, making your will prime for disputes, invalidity, or being contested by family members
Holographic wills often do not have witnesses to their creation, giving no proof that the testator wrote it
Holographic wills could be illegible because they are handwritten, adding more room for error

In short, your DIY will may have been free, easy, and even serve as a “valid” will. But probably what you want more than a piece of paper that says “will” on it, is the peace of mind of knowing you’re providing an ironclad plan for your loved ones after you’re gone. More than just a document, you want a plan that provides guidance and comfort to your family, so they know what your wishes are and so they can honor you by upholding them. Your loved ones are going to be stressed and overwhelmed and grieving at your loss—and one of the last new memories they have of you could either be finding a crumpled piece of paper stuffed in the back of a drawer with your hastily-written instructions on it, or finding a clear plan, crafted with the help of a professional and stored among your important documents, showing that you took the time to provide guidance and direction to your loved ones at a time when they needed it most.

It is important to ensure that your or your loved one’s final wishes are respected, and in certain situations, a holographic will may be the only option, but given the potential concerns of ambiguity, errors, and critical omissions, a formal will prepared with an estate lawyer’s advice will be far superior to—and protect you more than—a holographic will.

Mobile Estate Planning Made Easy

The process of getting a legitimate will in place for you and your family can be overwhelming, confusing, and costly, but it doesn’t have to be! At Assurest, we offer simple, affordable solutions for your legal needs and make the process easy by coming to you for the conversation—meeting you in your home or, if you prefer, virtually or over the phone.

Serving Richmond, Virginia and beyond, our experienced and trustworthy professionals simplify the process using clear, understandable language free of legal jargon and provide flat-rate packages, so you’re never surprised by the bill. Contact us today and rest assured that your affairs are in order and your loved ones are protected.

What Makes a Will Invalid?

Written by Matthew Reinaker on January 30, 2023. Posted in Last Will & Testament.

There are a number of reasons a will could be considered invalid. Here’s how to identify and contest an invalid will in Virginia.

One of the most important documents you will ever write is your last will and testament; yet many, to their own detriment, erroneously believe that they don’t need a will. These common misconceptions include not owning “many” assets, not being “old enough,” or just assuming their closest relatives are aware of and will carry out their wishes. And contrary to popular belief, holographic wills—or handwritten wills by the testator, or person making the will—may not hold up in court.

A man is sitting at table looking out the window and is stressed about his invalid will.

In a perfect world, everyone would band together when a loved one dies and be aligned on carrying out their last wishes. In reality, though, not having a valid will can create a ripple effect of family disputes that end up in probate court, costing time, money, and irreparable damage to relationships within families with the courts making the final decisions. It is not uncommon for family members who feel slighted by a loved one’s last will and testament, who didn’t get what they believe to be their fair share of the estate, to attempt to have a will declared invalid by contesting it in court.

Most people who end up in a lengthy, costly court battle contesting the will of a recently-deceased loved one (or being on the receiving end of a disgruntled family member contesting a will they may not have been included in) didn’t consider that this could be an outcome for them. Unfortunately, it’s not until it’s too late that they realize the gravity and dire consequences of not having the proper, legally-standing documentation in place much sooner.

Here’s everything you need to know about what makes a will invalid and how to contest an invalid will.

When is a Will Invalid?

A will may be declared invalid if it does not follow state law requirements. Additionally, a will that is too ambiguous, contains missing information or inaccuracies, or appears written under suspicious circumstances, someone may try to contest or challenge it, having it declared invalid in probate court.

Some common reasons a will may be declared invalid include:

The will has been forged
The deceased lacked testamentary capacity, or the mental capacity to coherently make decisions and write a will
The deceased was a victim of undue influence or was manipulated or pressured when writing their will
The deceased was a victim of elderly abuse or duress, threatened with violence, abuse, or other unethical, coercive action
The will was not signed, witnessed, or notarized appropriately
The deceased did not approve the contents of their will
The person who created the will can be proven to have been mentally ill, incapacitated, or otherwise lacked the capacity to make a will

How to Contest an Invalid Will

While laws vary by state, to contest a will in Virginia, you must:

Confirm that you are an “interested person” by legal definition. An interested person means someone who is entitled to receive property under the will or under the intestate laws of Virginia.
Determine whether or not you have grounds to contest the will based on the aforementioned reasons a will could be deemed invalid.
Submit a bill explaining your interest and reason for challenging the will per Virginia Code section 64-1.88.

If you believe a will is invalid, acting quickly is critical as the time limit for contesting a will is typically one year from the date the will is probated (or filed in the clerk of court’s office). If you are involved in a will contest or have questions about the validity of a will, seeking trusted specialized legal counsel can help simplify the process, ensure important deadlines are not missed, and give you peace of mind.

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Easy Estate Planning Checklist

Written by Matthew Reinaker on January 23, 2023. Posted in Estate Planning.

Take these 6 important steps to prepare your estate plan to protect your assets and loved ones in the future.

Many people have the assumption that an estate plan is associated with wealth. Don’t let the word “estate” fool you into thinking estate planning is only for the ultra-wealthy—an estate plan is for everyone. Your estate includes everything from property assets to your dropbox full of photos of your kids. The planning portion of an estate plan is created to cover all of your bases—from death to a disability, or even becoming incapacitated.

While these scenarios aren’t enjoyable things to think about, planning for them is one of the most selfless things you can do. Putting in this work proactively will protect you, your assets, and your loved ones. Use this estate planning checklist to make sure you have all your ducks in a row and can rest assured that your assets—and loved ones—are protected.

What is an Estate Plan?

An estate plan is a collection of documents and instructions regarding all of the details pertaining to the who, when, and how of your assets. This includes your last will and testament, power of attorney, and your plans for caring for dependents— making it easy for your loved ones to know how to handle your affairs when you no longer can.

Planning for your estate can feel like a daunting task and it will take some careful consideration but the best way to tackle it is to jump right in and start somewhere. This is not an exhaustive list, and it is always recommended to consult with an estate planning attorney to ensure your estate plan is ironclad, but it will help get you started with a solid foundation.

6-Step Estate Planning Checklist

Take Inventory of Your Assets: Grab your laptop and start making a list of your assets. There are many categories of assets so take time in each category and write down everything you can think of, even if it doesn’t seem like it has much value. Don’t forget to consider the following:

Physical assets can include homes, property, cars, boats, recreational vehicles, family heirlooms, collections, and belongings.
Monetary assets can include checking and savings accounts, health savings accounts, retirement accounts, mutual funds, and life insurance policies.
Digital assets can include digital investments, crypto wallets, digital files, photo galleries, and videos.

Create a Will: If you completed step one, congratulations! You will list those assets in your will and name the beneficiaries who will inherit those assets. You will also name an executor to carry out your will. This is where you will spell out your last will and testament—your final wishes. In most cases, your will needs to be signed by you, and two witnesses and must be notarized. Otherwise, the state might have other benchmarks that need to be met before the will is considered valid.

Gather Your Documents: If the thought of gathering and filing a bunch of paperwork feels stressful, start with this task:every time you access an account write down your username, password, and your security questions and answers down on a piece of paper. One thing people don’t consider is that if they die it will be very difficult for their executor, beneficiaries, or loved ones to access places where they might be storing important documents—like email, cloud files, or dropbox.

When you finish that task, move on to something a little more challenging like gathering documents that already exist. This can include your recent tax returns, investment statements, healthcare power of attorney, durable financial power of attorney, insurance policies, and your last will and testament naming your beneficiaries and executor.

Set up Guardianship for Dependants: If you have children or pets you will need to decide who will have legal guardianship over them and who will manage their inheritance and assets until they become old enough to take it over. If you do not name someone capable of these tasks, the court may decide for you.

Power of Attorney: There are many reasons you might need a power of attorney (POA) and each reason functions with its purpose. You will likely need multiple power of attorney documents to cover all of the possibilities. A POA gives a trusted person who you select the ability to make decisions on your behalf if you can not. A Durable Power of Attorney for Healthcare will allow your agent, the person you select, to step in when major medical decisions need to be made and you may not be able to make them. Without a power of attorney, you risk probate court assigning a conservator on your behalf. A Financial Power of Attorney allows your agent to pay bills, make bank deposits, or collect insurance benefits.

Update Your Estate Plan Regularly: It is wise to update your estate plan any time you have a major life event like a job change, major move, marriage/divorce, or the birth of a child. If you have gone longer than 12 months without considering your estate plan it might be a good idea to give it a once-over and update things like user names and passwords, new assets, or any changes regarding your last will and testament.

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How to Discuss Estate Planning with your Parents

Written by Matthew Reinaker on January 23, 2023. Posted in Estate Planning.

Do you know your parents’ last wishes? Here are 5 tips for initiating the often difficult estate planning conversation with your parents.

Nobody enjoys awkward or uncomfortable conversations, especially if the discussion revolves around what happens after your parents die.

For the vast majority of adult children, discussions about your parent’s estate only happen after significant injury or illness occurs, if at all. Avoiding a potentially difficult and awkward conversation unless absolutely necessary is natural, but waiting until an event forces your hand means having the conversation under stressful conditions which isn’t ideal. What’s worse, having the conversation after an event that limits their mental capacity such as a stroke means an added layer of complexity and risk. Being proactive in your estate planning discussion with your parents allows you to initiate the conversation under smoother, more convenient circumstances.

Here are some tips from an estate planning expert on getting those conversations started.

5 Tips for Discussing Estate Planning With Your Parents

Start with a compelling lead-in to the conversation. Approaching end-of-life discussions with parents can be challenging and uncomfortable. However, clients often report that just starting the conversation is the hardest part. Begin the discussion using your got-me-thinking gateway—or, in other words, a sequence of thoughts or an event that spurred you to have the discussion with them. This could be a recent life event such as a friend dealing with declining health. Perhaps you saw a movie or television show where the contents of a will were discussed and it made you consider your family’s personal situation and want them to feel confident and prepared. You could even reference this very blog post as a way to open the door to the estate planning discussion. Whatever got you thinking about your parents’ end-of-life plans in the first place, leverage that curiosity as your own conversation starter.
Use “I”, not “you”, statements. It is not uncommon for parents to react defensively or shut down altogether when the topic of estate planning is broached. After all, the idea of discussing what happens after you die isn’t a comfortable subject for most people. In your approach, be mindful of how you state your intentions. Avoid ‘you’ statements like, “You should be thinking about this”, or “You need to prioritize these matters.” Statements crafted this way may seem pushy and convey unintended judgment that prevents a productive discussion from ensuring. Instead, use “I” statements like, “I would feel honored knowing…” or “I want to be better prepared to support you.”. “I” statements convey humility while acknowledging that the parents are still in charge of their own affairs, making them more apt to continue the discussion and collaborate to execute a plan.
Respect the role reversal. Over time, the traditional parent-child role shifts. Aging parents may be reluctant to discuss their financial security, or lack thereof, with their adult children. Be understanding if parents feel more comfortable consulting with a neutral third party, since, after all, the goal is to get their affairs in order. Offer praise and support for any willingness to participate and reinforce their engagement in discussions.
Try to stay objective. Discussing end-of-life arrangements is often an emotional undertaking for all involved. Try to remain objective in your support and avoid asking about any personal inheritance you may receive. Instead of asking them to disclose specific numbers, ask for general information about who their creditors are, where their accounts are kept, and which individuals they wish to handle their affairs.
Plan for follow-up conversations. After that first conversation, no matter how much ground is covered, decide when you’ll revisit the topic again together. Set a date so the expectation and next steps are clear to all those involved. Follow up on any identified need to update their documentation and reach out to them often to ensure continuity and progress.

Securing a loved one’s legacy begins with one initial conversation. An estate planning professional can help you embrace that challenge and support your efforts in proactively getting a dialogue started with those you love most.

Mobile Estate Planning Made Easy

The process of getting a legitimate will in place for you and your family can be overwhelming, confusing, and costly, but it doesn’t have to be! At Asurest, we offer simple, affordable solutions for your legal needs and make the process easy by coming to you for the conversation—meeting you in your home or, if you prefer, over Zoom or telephone.

Serving clients throughout Virginia, our experienced and trustworthy professionals simplify the process using clear, understandable language free of legal jargon and provide flat-rate packages, so you’re never surprised by the bill. Contact us today and rest assured that your affairs are in order and your loved ones are protected.